Customers are quick learners. We’ve learned, for example, to ignore subscription renewal letters that come months in advance of our actual expiration date; from experience, we know that there’s no urgency – plenty of other letters will come in the next few months reminding us to renew.
That’s why I’m concerned about a prevailing abuse of the word (or concept), “relationship.” As a pretext for sending me overwhelming amounts of unsolicited email, marketers tell me (in the fine print), that I’m receiving this cascade of irrelevant and irritating material because we have some kind of “relationship.”
Often, I cannot recall what that “relationship” is; when did I give permission for this volume of vacuous nonsense? It turns out that by purchasing a product, I’ve initiated a “relationship.” By downloading a free case study, I’ve initiated a “relationship.” By simply making a request for more information, again, I’ve initiated a “relationship.”
From my perspective, as a consumer, I’ve done no such thing. But from a marketing perspective (especially in the context of cumbersome Do Not Call laws), these are “relationship” opportunities we cannot afford to neglect.
Beware, my marketing colleagues, beware. (Cue in howling sounds.) If we teach consumers/prospects/customers that every interaction with us will result in a barrage of unwanted communications, they will indeed learn. I’ve already begun to hesitate before responding to “free” ebook offers or even asking a question on a live chat forum. And I suspect millions of other consumers are responding (or will respond) similarly. Because we’re learning that every teeny-tiny peep on our part will result in a “relationship” with sales efforts as unwelcome as midnight stalkers.
Real relationships take time. Just because someone thanks you for holding the door open doesn’t mean you’re invited to pack your toothbrush and spend the night. As marketers, we need to be prudent. Don’t punish a modest indication of interest with a painful deluge of solicitations. If we do, we’ll be rewarded with swift kicks to our collective behinds.
Hear! Hear! Jonathon. I now set up a separate email account for things I sign up for. Filter and ignore!
I always urge clients to ask for the minimal information, send not-so-frequent autoresponders, and don’t make them sign up for anything if not totally necessary. If they got what you sent, and it was worth their time, they’ll remember where it came from.
I tell my clients that our goal is to establish themselves (my clients) as the “source of authority” in whatever it is they are promoting – be it plumbing or legal services or poop scooping. Show them you know your stuff. Let people get used to coming to you for the answers. When they are ready to buy, THEY will have built the trust relationship themselves. You were just happy to oblige and hold that door open for them.
Jonathan, spot on. It continues to amaze me how some companies train their customers to ignore them.
All too often, email senders think of there cost per email as zero, when in fact they often have a huge cost in terms of brand degradation.
Your message can’t be repeated enough.
I referred to it as “conditioning”:
http://emailmarketing101.blogspot.com/2008/02/pavlovs-dog-conditioning-your.html
Thanks Kathy and Philip!
Yeah, I think we all have to exercise caution. If we blow this — if we abuse our lines of communication with potential customers — we’re going to suffer lots of slammed doors in our faces.
The misuse of the word ‘relationship’ to describe what is in effect spam is pretty irritating, especially since a positive relationship can exist between senders and recipients. It’s a case of reminding consumers repeatedly of why they signed up in the first place – to receive relevant special offers, free informative white papers etc – by continuing to provide them! Segmenting mailing lists can be tedious work but the return on investment of engaged contacts is well worth it.
Jonathan, great post! I hate those subscription requests that come six months before my subscription is up. I rip them up as soon as they arrive…
You bring up a great point, when did marketers think it was okay to just sign everyone up under the guise of a ‘relationship?!’ I had a potential client add me to their email list just because we had a phone call. What?! Am I even in your target audience?
I am wondering how long the trend will last.
“Just because someone thanks you for holding the door open doesn’t mean you’re invited to pack your toothbrush and spend the night.”
I love this metaphor. Marketers have misbehaved for so long that even those who endeavor to do it right have their work cut out for them in overcoming the cold shoulder consumers have learned to give all commercial interests.
“Relationship?” BS. Give them value.
Bravo, sir! Thanks for pointing out an inevitable result of emphasizing relationship-building–that marketers will start abusing the term.
I for one propose this: that we call up any organization that claims to have a “relationship” with us and call them out on it. We could ask them questions such as, “If you really had a relationship with me, wouldn’t you know I don’t like getting junk mail?”
Amen!
From the digital side, what’s been picking at me lately is when I go to a blog/site looking to read their content, and instead am given an immediate popup asking for me to signup for their newsletter. 9 times out of 10, I immediately leave. Let me enjoy what you have to say and connect with you before I consider joining your email list.
Honestly, there are more subtle ways to do this and throwing it at my face is not it.
Behind the word relationship is the idea of 1) an emotional connection between 2 people 2) some level of trust. I don’t think relationship can be used in the context of mass/automated marketing techniques which originates from system (and yes the system has a lot of data about you but that’s not what makes a relationship. It doesn’t know about emotion/trust etc…).
Yes and No. You know sometimes spam is spam and sometimes it is not.
Sort of reminds me of the SNL skit on sexual harassment with Tom Brady.
http://www.vsocial.com/video/?d=59670
Great comments, all. Thank you!
Hey, after we dismantle “relationship,” why don’t we dismember “partnership”? Don’t you hate it when would-be vendors approach you with a “partnership opportunity” when really, they just want to sell you something? There’s nothing wrong with trying to sell me something; just don’t call it something it’s not.
I was going to write this blog post yesterday. Guess I was too late.
Very well said. I know I hesitate before downloading a “Free” whitepaper because I know what it means- an unwelcome sales person is going to contact me and push me to set up a demo for a product that I do not need or want. Which is exactly what happened to me yesterday.
Liz,
Unfortunately, we’ve all learned that “free” doesn’t mean free; we’re going to pay for it one way or another.
I hope the whitepaper was worth it!
Same problem, different era. When I was growing up, I learned that I didn’t enjoy shopping when the clerks were insistent about helping me — sometimes to the point of standing in the open doorway of a department store fitting room to give the sales pitch.
As long as companies try to increase market share, there’s always going to be tension between the need to encourage customers to buy the product and the level of civility the customers expect.
Same problem, different era. When I was growing up, I learned that I didn’t enjoy shopping when the clerks were insistent about helping me — sometimes to the point of standing in the open doorway of a department store fitting room to give the sales pitch.
As long as companies try to increase market share, there’s always going to be tension between the need to encourage customers to buy the product and the level of civility the customers expect.
Barbara,
How things have changed: now it’s nearly impossible to find a department store clerk when you actually want their help.
I also keep a separate email account solely for filtering out the spam.
And I agree with the other posters. If you provide meaningful, relevant content I will save the email, bookmark the link or in general remember where/how to find you. Don’t give me popups to sign up for your newsletter. Allow me to read your content and determine it’s importance to me. Provide a well-designed, prominent space for me to sign up for an email or RSS feed. For me a soft sell, while demonstrating and promoting your expertise, will work far more often than an in-my-face push.
“Relationship” is indeed yet another word that marketers and companies use without always knowing exactly what it entails. “Sustainability” is another of my favorites.
We humans are simple creatures. I believe the issue is the complexity of such concepts, and how much thought, effort and passion actually has to go into cultivating relationships or being sustainable. It’s hard to wrap our minds around all that, particularly when we can’t see beyond immediate gratification or short-term results.
Peter,
“Sustainability” makes the speaker sound thoughtful — without committing him/her to anything concrete. It’s the cumulus cloud of PC catchphrases.
Jonathan, excellent points! It has become all too common for individuals and companies to assume that possession of your information is blanket permission to market you. I believe everyone could do a better job at respecting these boundaries.