When I was younger, I played in bands, and, being somewhat loud-mouthed and extroverted, I tended to be the front man.
One evening while hanging out at a bar where we frequently played, a singer friend of mine gave me some advice regarding my stage act: Stop swearing.
The fact was that, either because I thought it was cool or punk or funny, I would swear on the mic and even cuss in my songs. My friend’s view was that it simply wasn’t necessary. What I was doing was entertaining enough, and I didn’t have to go for cheap laughs by cussing.
From that moment forward, I made every effort not to cuss while performing and, if a cuss word inadvertently slipped out, as it
sometimes did, I immediately apologized for it
I was reminded of my friend’s advice during our recent B2b Forum when several speakers cussed from the podium. To be fair, one was a professional comedian and at least one other was in character, but whenever cussing happened, I was slightly shocked.
Look, I’m no Boy Scout. I cuss quite liberally around my friends, and I laugh out loud at movies where cussing is creatively deployed, but I guess I still have a sense of decorum in business conferences. I understand why someone may cuss in such circumstances—to get people’s attention or make an emphatic point—but, on a gut level, cussing just doesn’t sit well with me.
Am I just an old fuddy-duddy?
Tags: business ethics, marketing conferences, profanity, professional speaking
You are an old F*#@$$%-duddy alright! Just kidding, I agree with you, shock and awe should be relegated to bombs not boardrooms.
Ha! I think that, at times, it can be worth it to “cuss for effect,” but it should be pretty deliberate, not gratuitous.
You are not an old fuddy duddy, just more mature (meaning, more considerate of other peoples’ sensibilities). At HubSpot in Boston this summer, online marketing guru Gary Vaynerchuk used the blue language that is so integral to his act, and people seemed not to mind too much. Although exceptional people can get away with it, I think even Vaynerchuk’s presentations would not suffer from the deletion of profanity.
Thanks for a thoughtful post.
Thanks, Ken. I realize too that some folks have made it part of their personal brand but I think you are correct, if they took it out, the absence of profanity wouldn’t detract at all from their message.
I happened (quite by accident of involuntary scheduling/rescheduling) to stumble upon Gary Vaynerchuk giving a seminar at the Salesforce.com user group meeting (Dreamforce) last year.
I had no idea who he was, and almost skipped out of the session…but, at the last minute, noticed that it was PACKED and, in fact, there was a line of people waiting in the hope that someone might leave so that they could get in.
Of course, this made me realize that this particular session might have some value…and boy was i right! However, it wasn’t until his first cuss that i sat bolt-upright in my chair (thinking, “did i just here this guy drop the F-bomb”) and I immediately ceased my other wi-fi related activities, in order to give him my full & undivided attention.
Long story short, the cuss certainly got my attention, and my engagement with his session was infinitely better for it. However, i’ll absolutely agree that it was all in the delivery and the fact that this guy knew his stuff. His confidence and complete “ownership”/command of the subject matter made it possible for the entire room to forgive his unorthodox presentation style.
I’m now a huge admirer of Gary Vaynerchuk and, in fact, have since attended two webinars purely because i noticed his name on the bill.
Gary has definitely crafted a persona for himself where swearing is part of his no “baloney” shtick.
Still, I wonder exactly how necessary cussing is to his teaching. It was not ALWAYS part of it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BZ_6h59omTo
Matthew, you are so bang on here with your post! There are times and places and yes, those select few individuals that can carry it off without being belligerent. That being said, we should still conduct ourselves with the appropriate decorum reflecting the company we are in and the business environment we represent. Business standards should always have some polish and respect.
Thanks for the comment, Rochelle.
I think it comes down to a question of respect, as you mention. I don’t believe that there is anything wrong with cussing per se (I’m sure I’ve even uttered cuss words today!) but in a professional context it seems to indicate an indifference to the sensibilities of others.
I learned this the hard way. Talking to some folks at a conference I casually swore and could immediately tell it took them aback. I apologized and it reminded me that we don’t always know who we’re talking to. Maintaining a sense of decorum is a way of showing respect and not being presumptuous about where people have come from, what they believe and what will or will not make them uncomfortable.
Once in a while, a well-timed swear can be hilarious or shocking, but I think it has no place in business. It’s a lazy way to get someone’s attention. I teach my kids that people who cuss are not intelligent or creative enough to find the right word to communicate what it is they want to say.
Jeannie – I tend to think it’s more of a creativity issue than an intelligence issue. Swear words can be an easy way to get a laugh/attention.
The funny thing is that it can often be funnier to use the “safe” replacement for the swear (“Frickin’”) than the word itself, especially if people are expecting the swear.
Agreed. I have few rules in my business, but one of them is no swearing in a professional setting. You never know who will be offended by your words, and there’s rarely a time in the professional world when cursing adds to the dialogue.
Sometimes I think it’s just laziness—if you don’t feel like finding more sophisticated language to be emphatic, swearing’s an easy way to add emphases. And while there are those who have made it a part of their branding, there’s an equal number who have successfully created funny and edgy branding without swearing.
The most successful people I know don’t swear in professional settings. The ones who do and are successful are few and far between…and I suspect their success will be far more short-lived than those who have stood the test of time.
Susan, I too think that sometimes people try to convey “edginess” through swearing. True edginess, however, actually comes from an unconventional, surprising and intriguing perspective—and THAT is difficult to develop, let alone express.
I agree with this post. I don’t think that cussing has any place in a professional setting. I work in an office which I would consider to be a professional setting. All of my co-workers, bosses, and managers cuss and use profane language all day and for no good reason. My boss even cussed quite frequently in my initial interview which I found completely unprofessional. It just flows out of their mouths so frequently that it’s distracting. I don’t approve of cussing and try not to do it myself. When I hear language like this is distracts me and even offends me some of the time. I don’t find it necessary in a business/professional setting at all. I wish more places would try to be more considerate of who they might be offending, especially when it’s in a place where it’s not necessary.
Can you imagine a candidate cussing during an interview? I’ve seen it happen and it did not end well for that candidate.
I agree that part it’s really just a question of respect. Some people don’t curse and, as you say, even find it offensive. People shouldn’t have to feel offended at work, or like they have to keep their feelings about it to themselves.
Also, with heightened HR sensitivity around “hostile” work environments, people really ought to think twice!
Yes I agree. What really bothers me though are the types of profanities used in my office. It’s not just h*ll or d*mn, those I could take, but it goes way beyond that to major usage of F-bombs as well as religious profanities. I think the religious profanities have even more of a negative effect to some people because it goes deeper than just cuss words.
I think a professional office should be a place of respect and people should be mindful of everyone who’s working there. It’s pretty selfish to think that you could use such words and phrases and not potentially offend someone.
Interesting discussion, especially because I’ve heard Gary speak and because I am a professional speaker. Some meeting planners have sent me their rules and protocols in advance so speakers would know that swearing is off limits.
The funny thing is that many of the marketing audiences are comprised of creative people. In my recollection from working in an agency workplace years ago, they encouraged a free flow of information while providing a laid-back environment. Often that included cussing. I assumed that this transcended to many other marketing-type workplaces. Thanks for enlightening me that this isn’t the case.
BTW, I don’t swear in my presentations, but I admit to using the “safe replacements” that Matthew mentioned.
Thanks for chiming in, Elaine!
I too have worked in creative/marketing environments where swearing was “normal,” but am now more sensitive to regional differences in this area.
At our recent B2B Forum, I was speaking with two folks, one who is a friend and one whom I had only met at a previous MarketingProfs event. My friend swore at one point and I, semi-jokingly, said, “Such language.” He later let another one fly and the person we were speaking with, who did not seem to appreciate the swearing, said, “It must be an East Coast thing.”
I must say, if the other person swears first, I may be more inclined to follow suit, but tend to avoid it in professional contexts even then.
Just wanted to confess here that while giving a talk at the MarketingCloud Educational Summit in Austin last week, I was having trouble with the remote control and I swore (G*d d*mmit) in frustration.
So, mea culpa!
Great conversation!
I too am a professional speaker. I’m spending the day researching the use of words similar to “truck” and “split” in professional presentations.
For many years I’ve had to brands: Good Christopher and Bad Christopher. This means two Facebook profiles, two fan pages, and multiple Twitter accounts.
Even the Good Christopher is very edgy and why I’ve been asked to speak many times. This entire conversation is interesting because my research shows it’s split right down the middle for the most part.
Everyone isn’t going to be YOUR people as a speaker. There’s Larry Winget who’s edgy, but doesn’t APPEAR to cuss (but he’s been heard at live events). Then, I came across Gary today and his video from the SWSX in 2011. Now, I have ADHD to the NTH degree, but ya know what, I watched the ENTIRE 60min video and did NOTHING else!
He kept my attention! That alone is amazing. Well placed, but truly heartfelt swear words only impressed upon me his passion and dedication for the topic he was speaking about.
My brand is authenticity no matter if it’s Good Christopher or Bad Christopher. But, like others have said, a well placed “Are you f’g KIDDING me with your BS” works!
Just my two cents and hope to see you at one of my events someday!!!
http://www.master-motivators.com
http://www.thebluecollarguide.com
All my best,
Christopher
I’ve definitely seen profanity used towards good and frequently humorous ends in public presentations, so I’m not opposed to it in principle.
Rather, as you suggest, I think that people/presenters should be mindful and strategic about their cussing, if they are going to do it and should also make sure they aren’t doing it just because the “cool kids” are.